If God had wanted us to use the metric system, he would have chosen TEN disciples.

Healthy? This town is so healthy when they founded it they had to shoot a few people to start the cemetery.

For health and safety reasons, please speak to me after I have had my coffee.

In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not. -Yogi Bera-

The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself. -Benjamin Franklin-

Investment in software reliability will increase until it exceeds the probable cost of errors.

Truth is generally the best vindication against slander. -Abraham Lincoln-

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends. -Benjamin Franklin-

My chief concern is to try to be an humble, earnest Christian. -Robert E. Lee-