No amount of belief makes something a fact. -James Randi-

Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice. -Major Sidney Theodore Freedman, “M*A*S*H”-

I gotta have a reason for everything? -Calvin, “Calvin & Hobbes”-

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on my list.

Did ya hear the one about the lensmaker who fell into his glass grinding machine and made spectacle of himself?

Ona long God istap antap, na long graun gutpela taim ol manmeri; God i laikim tumas.

I never saw a purple cow, I never hope to see one. But judging from the milk we get, I’m certain there must be one.

The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away. -Tom Waits-

Thank God for the last minute. Otherwise, a lot of stuff wouldn’t get done.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?