You should be able to laugh at yourself. After all, everyone else does.

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t go to yours. -Yogi Bera-

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. -Calvin, “Calvin & Hobbes”-

I am not one who — who flamboyantly believes in throwing a lot of words around. -George H. W. Bush-

BIBLE: Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth

Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft — and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor. -Wernher von Braun-

One way to make sure crime doesn’t pay would be to let the government run it. -Ronald Reagan-

You can always count on the Americans to do the right thing — after they have tried everything else. -Winston Churchill-

Liberals encourage diversity of opinions and beliefs, if they’re pretty much the same opinions and beliefs already held by liberals. -Daniel Walker-

Fifteen men on the dead man’s chest — Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum! Drink and the devil had done for the rest — Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum! -Robert Louis Stevenson-